Sunday, February 28, 2016

Green Inferno, Book News,Youtube Wants Your Content For Free, and the World Isn't Flat You Moron

It's been an interesting week.

I saw Green Inferno...and *gasp* I liked it. A lot! Whaaaaaat? It's clever, it's funny, and best of all, it's not overly shocksploitationy like Cannibal Holocaust (which is it a total homage to, even the title. Before they went with CH, it was going to be called Green Inferno. Good times).

I'll be doing an in-depth review of it over on Bloody Whisper for my Masterpiece or Menace series soon.

Oh, what's that? You didn't know that I was writing those? Well then, head on over.

Here's the links to my reviews:


Crimson Peak


Cannibal Holocaust


The Babadook Part 1

The Babadook Part 2

Anyways, where was I?

Oh yeah.

Book News!

The proofing copy will be heading to the printers this week! Woo hoo!

The cover art is done, and I'm super happy with it. I'll share images in next week's update!

Here's some info about my book:

It's called Symbiosis. It's the first book (or phase one) in a series I'm calling The Caddis Initiative.

Here's the back of the book blurb, since I know that you really, really want to know what it's about, like right now:

When twisted monstrosities of flesh and metal rise up out of the sea and crawl into the pipes of a water treatment plant, a beautiful ball-busting Latina and her girlfriend desperately try to stave off the seething hoards.

Will they survive? 

Or will they be devoured by the nightmares lumbering onto the shores of New Jersey?

Yes. It's about a gay Latina plumber trying to save her town from monsters that are coming from the sea, and you won't believe the reason behind the invasion!

(HINT: This is a Sci-Fi Body Horror book. A mix between Carpenter's "The Thing" and the book, "The Hot Zone")

Soooo...what's next? Oh right.



YouTube wants Your Content for Free, and Doesn't want to Pay You Fair Compensation for It.

Guess what?

It doesn't want to pay it's contributors a fair amount. Eh...don't. No. NOPE! Stop it. Don't say a word. Shhhh.....

Sure, it SAYS it pays 55% of ad revenue to each content channel. BUT, and that's a big but, that doesn't include the type of ads the companies will pay to appear on your video, how often the ads appear, and how much taxes are taken out. Yes. That's right. You gotta pay income tax on that shit. Don't let anyone trick you into thinking that you don't. Because you do.

But Cassie, my videos got 1 million views and I made $1,000 last year.

1. That's a nice supplementary income. You can buy a new flat screen TV with that.
2. That's not a living wage.

There are people that whine because they don't have enough subscribers to make tens of thousands of dollars a year on YouTube. OK. Fine. Whine all you want, that isn't going to get you more views.

But, that's not my main point here. My main point is that YouTube is no longer FOR YOU. (They should probably do some re-branding, switch it to CorpTube or something to adequately reflect the change in business model). Between the Fair Use wars that reviewers are having with the Copyright Cartels aka Paramount, Fox, Universal, The Weinstein Bros etc. etc. et. al. and the fact that there are so  many things you can't put up on the old YouTube anymore...why would you TRUST THE BIG CORPORATION to be fair and give you the proper amount of earnings.

Are you given a itemized bill? Do you see where your money comes from? Where the deductions are taken out of? No. I bet you don't. At all.

Youtube made 1.22 Billion dollars last year. Yes. That's right. Billions of Dollars. And yet, Google says that it made no profit, mainly because the revenue was reinvested into the company. Don't let the wordplay fool you. It was profitable. It made fucking money. It made a metric fuck-ton of money. And the little guys? The guys giving a god-awful amount of free videos for them to put paid ads on? They're not even seeing a fraction of a percent of that cash.We're talking $0.00047 for every view. 

Call me crazy, but I come from the school of thought that says that it's a moral imperative to pay your workers. If someone is doing the hard work for you-- even though in this case, it's an informal business situation with unknown employees uploading a gazillion videos onto the servers per day--you should properly compensate them for their work.

Yes, there is absolutely NO QUALITY CONTROL. Yes, the bots remove shit the moment it is flagged by someone, corporate goon or not, and yes, the paychecks are rather dismal in comparison to what the company rakes in at the end of the fiscal year. It's sad, really.

Just another example of a big corporation not giving two whits about where or how they make their money, as long as they get it and they screw over as many people as possible doing so.

And if you still believe that Pewdie Pie is a YouTube Millionaire after that? I have a bridge in Albuquerque to sell you.

Did he make that much money? It's possible. It's also possible that he was a paid poster boy by Google, to con people into believing that they could make a decent living uploading videos (i.e. free fucking content for YouTube). For Google, it's a win-win situation. They don't have to work hard, just keep up the servers, and let the ad revenue pour in like it's Niagara Falls. Companies seek them out. Sign up, pay for ads to show up. They don't even have to go cold calling or handing out flyers at the mall. EASY FUCKING MONEY.

Is it a genius business model? Yes. Yes it is. Is it ethical? Fuck no.

Here, this is a direct quote from Business Insider's article "Yes, You Can Make Six Figures As A YouTube Star ... And Still End Up Poor ." The link to the full article is right here. Click it. READ IT!

Ready? (Yes this is copy/pasta. I did it to make a point. Google will probably hate me for it. Whatever. This is about Olga Kay. Some alleged YouTube star that I have never even heard of before.)

"It's a great story if you want some hard numbers on the costs and revenues of being internet famous:
  • Kay has earned $100,000 to $300,000 in each of the last three years. She has 1 million subscribers. That number is merely the gross revenue, however.
  • She makes 20 videos a week, all of which are filled with ads via Google's automated YouTube partners program.
  • Kay likely gets about $7.60 per 1,000 ad views, down from $9.35 in 2012, according to TubeMogul, which buys and sells video ads.
  • Ads are only run on a minority of videos show. Roughly, a video creator will earn $2,000 for every million views. "And then YouTube takes 45 percent," the Times notes. (The IRS will take its cut of the remainder, too.)
  • Kay spends $500-$700 a week on editing costs.
In other words, Kay is probably getting by on less than 50% of what her videos make in gross revenue. In a $100,000 year, she might be looking at $15,000 annually, after YouTube's cut, taxes and editing costs, according to our back-of the-envelope math ($100,000 minus $45,000 for YouTube, minus 30% for the IRS, minus editing costs at $500 per week for 50 weeks)."
Depressing, isn't it? Also, why the fuck is she paying someone that much per week to edit her own damn videos? Do it yourself woman! Keep your damn money. Damn!

Why am I ranting? Because I'm friends with Youtubers, and I know people that think it's an easy way to get rich quick and I'm here to tell you, it's not. It's so not. But hey, you want to supplement your income? Get an extra paycheck this year? Go ahead, become a YouTube star.

However, consider yourself warned. It's not a viable, sustainable way to make an income. It is, however, a good way to earn some extra spending money.

So if you don't care about being shafted by THE MAN, go for it. Have fun. Just don't whine to me about not getting more than a couple thousand  dollars from your hugely successful YouTube channel about cats that run ant farms that has 5 million viewers. Thanks.

Also, if you're smart, you'll use YouTube to sell products on another site, that's how most of those YouTubers actually make money. Like Lindsey Stirling.

The World is Flat? Whaaaaaat?

I've noticed the disturbing and utterly mind-boggling trend for uneducated sheeple aka morons to state, quite proudly I might add, that the WORLD IS FLAT.


There. I said it. Someone had to.

Look at this. LOOK AT IT!

Thanks NASA for proving yet again, that the Earth is a damn sphere. 

It is not. Fucking. FLAT. It is a sphere, it rotates. Deal with it you damn Flatlanders.

Good Lord. What year is it? Why the FUCK are we still having this god damned debate? UGH!


Have a good one guys. Take care of each other. Oh, and take care of that one guy. You know who he is...he really needs some help this week.


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Monday, February 22, 2016

Updates: Podcast Interviews, Book Formatting, and The Witch (2016)

OK, so I didn't do an update on Saturday, or Sunday. This is Monday. But damn it, at least I remember to write one. lol (Yes, I am that busy right now. Deal with it.)

Terror Talk Interview

First up, on Saturday 2/20 I did a Terror Talk interview with Pete Yagmin for my podcast Carnage Cove. Pete is a short horror film maker that is slowly carving out a niche for himself on the Internets and indie film scene.

It was a fun interview, and I found that I had a lot in common with him, in terms of watching movies and paying attention to the plot, not enjoying low-brow humor (even though I actually made a poo joke when we started discussing how CGI was used in John Wick to make dog poop. $4k for CGI dog poop. Yeah... Priorities much?), and having a love for supernatural horror films in all shapes and sizes.

The interview will appear in episode 5 of Carnage Cove. I'll share the link when it's up.

Book News

My debut novel, "The Caddis Initiative: Symbiosis" is almost officially, officially done. The formatting is in it's last stages, so I should have a release date soon! Woo!

The Witch (2016)

This not a micro-review of whatever the kiddies are calling those things nowadays. This is an observation. 

Several of my buddies went to see "The Witch" this weekend. Some loved it, some loathed it. What I noticed? The people that don't enjoy slow burn psychological horror films hated it. They just HATED it. (They have the same opinion about "The Babadook" and "It Follows", i.e. it's over-hyped and not scary at all, so that really didn't surprise me.)

My friends and colleges that enjoy a good slow burn movie, really loved it. So there's that.

Here's the thing:

It's pretty darn clear in the trailer that it's an atmospheric thriller that questions what is real and what is not. So...what the fuck did you think that you were going to see? A torture porn flick full of viscera and gore and the ubiquitous 15 jump scares? Seriously.

Be responsible.

Watch trailers pro-actively. If you aren't sure if a movie is a slow burn or not, ask your friends, your spouse, your dog, your cat, your neighbor. One of them will be able to tell you if it's your kind of movie or not. That way you spare yourself the "boredom" of watching another "over-hyped" "slow" "not scary" horror film.

You know how you don't think psychological horror is scary? I feel the same way about torture porn and jump scares. Remember that.

Stay tuned for news next week, where I may or may not wax poetically about how to write a good horror parody. Oh the suspense! 

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Sunday, February 14, 2016

Updates: Carnage Cove Podcast, My Debut Novel, Conventions, and Making Short Horror Films.

Hey Guys,

It's been a while, hasn't it?

I've been stupid busy juggling several projects, and I thought that I'd take the time to share what I've been up to.

I Wrote a Book!

My debut novel, Symbiosis, The Caddis Initiative Book 1 is being published by Bloody Whisper Books and is in the final stages of book layout for print and eBook formatting. The cover is almost done as well.

Rough estimate to when a release date will be announced? February 29th. Leap Year Day. Best non-day of the year.

What is it about?

It's a sci fi body horror story, about monstrosities that come out of the sea and start using everything for body parts...including living animals and people. Yikes!

I'll give more info the closer we get to it's release date, like the synopsis and where you can buy it and junk.

Carnage Cove Podcast

I'm Producing, Writing, Editing, Directing the Carnage Cove Podcast. It's a horror humor parody podcast radio play. The main skit is Paranormal Reality, and it's about a group of idiots that bumble their way through investigating ghosts and haunted houses and whatnot. Good times.

I got 8 people to join me and to work as voice actors.

1 episode is out, and I have four more to edit and put up online. Currently the first episode can be found on Soundcloud. (The link is at the top of the page. You can't miss it.) Once I have all five done, I will be putting them on iTunes and a bunch of different podcast playing sites.

Good times.

Convention Attendance and Making Stuff to Sell Because I'm Crazy Like That

Part of my plans is making little doodads and horror themed chibis with clay (yes, that's complete with eyeballs and tentacles and everything) and selling them at conventions, along with my books. The idea is to put up impulse buys that sell at $5 a pop, and to get people's attention, and draw them to my table, so that I can convince them to buy my book. We'll see how it goes.

I Got a Video Camera! 

You know what that means? Yup. I'm going to start making short horror films this summer.


That's it for now.

I'm planning on doing weekly updates (every Sunday) on what I have been up to so that you guys can keep track of my shenanigans. We'll see if I can get my ass in gear and do it on a regular basis or not. lol

Happy Valentines Day and all that jazz.

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